monobeartheater:

absorr:

ultrafacts:

Source For more posts like this, CLICK HERE to follow Ultrafacts

 Some of you are reblogging because you think its funny that programmers would talk to ducks. I’m reblogging because I think its funny picturing a programmer explaining their code, realizing what they did when they explain the bad code, then grabbing the strangling the duck while yelling “WHY WAS THE FIX THAT SIMPLE!? AM I GOING BLIND!”

AS A PROGRAMMER I CAN TELL YOU THAT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU FUCKING DO WE HAD TO BAN THE DUCKS FROM MY CLASSES BECAUSE EVERYONE WOULD FLIP THE DUCK OR THROW IT AT A WALL OR SOMETHING WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM IN THEIR CODE

grimmbutt:

'I Don't Know What I Did But It Worked' — A thrilling story about my academic life

tom-sits-like-a-whore:

reasons to date me

  • no pressure to wear pants in my presence
  • or any clothes at all really
  • but it’s up to you
  • u can be big spoon or little spoon
  • totally your choice
  • i’m always ready to make out
  • aLwaYs
  • also u don’t even have to buy me things just maybe an ice cream cone every once in a while that’s it 
  • i’ll let you lick it though
  • i mean the ice cream cone
  • well not just the ice cream cone

violent masturbating to mufasas death scene in the lion king

THIS IS THE LINE NOOOO

edgebug:

instead of watching the 50 Shades trailer, why not just make awkward eye contact with a total stranger at the grocery store for a solid 2 minutes and 34 seconds? you get the same skin-crawling, uncomfortable feeling but without the shitty writing, terrible acting and massive dose of rape culture

sarcarstic:

We’re having pizza for dinner, is that ok?

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xcuteikinz:

gryffindorgeek7777:

mad-piper-with-a-box:

thetomska:

giddytf2:

the-last-teabender:

Robin Thicke is unapologetic about how rapey ‘Blurred Lines’ is, meanwhile the dude who parodied it issues a public apology for one word.

And that is just one reason why I love Weird Al.

It’s great that he’s addressed this but are we really supposed to believe that NO ONE during the extremely lengthy processes of writing a song, recording it, mastering it and animating the music video wouldn’t have brought it up?

Excuse me but how the hell is spastic even remotely insulting?

So I just recently learned that in the UK calling someone spastic means the same thing as calling someone retarded, only much worse.

If it makes people in the UK feel any better, people in the US literally do not know this (like literally no one I have ever met and/or know). Here being spastic is usually meant to mean something along the lines of acting like a hyper-active child (like running around in circles yelling just because they feel like it please be quiet for just 2 minutes type of child). NOBODY here uses it as a slur.

Since Weird Al is a US musician and the US music industry is pretty non-international, yeah actually I think its entirely possible that none of the people who worked on this song actually knew that spastic was considered an awful slur in some parts of the world.

And I’m like 99.9999% sure that Weird Al is genuinely very sorry that he was accidentally offensive.

^^^^^

dumpsterdog:deonte-s:actuallyactuallywait actually
dumpsterdog:deonte-s:actuallyactuallywait actually
dumpsterdog:deonte-s:actuallyactuallywait actually
dumpsterdog:deonte-s:actuallyactuallywait actually

dumpsterdog:

deonte-s:

actually

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actually

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wait actually

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thevoicecalledcheesecake:

In case you still don’t understand how badly women have had it, when anaesthetic was first invented doctors weren’t allowed to give it to women who were giving birth because the church said that the pain of childbirth was God punishing women for not being men

speedlimit15:

*pronounces “hors d’oeuvres” as “horse divorce”*

abbygubler:

itssexualhour:

My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms  23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed

the fuck kind of romeo and juliet is this 

enjolradz:

friendly reminder that if we’re mutuals and you wanna exchange snapchat names or instagram or something you’re more than welcome (encouraged) to shoot me an ask

promiscuous-petal:

enough about sex positions has anyone discovered a reading position which doesn’t get uncomfortable after 5 minutes

  • KID : mommy, i cant sleep, there's a monster under my bed
  • MOM : that's silly, theres no such thing as mo- OH GOD ITS TEARING MY ARM! Just kidding, he only eats kids, goodnight!

rneatbicycle:

that’s what little girls are made of